There was something of an "A-HA!" moment one day when my daughter asked for a piece of fried chicken. We were drifting on our local river, the Deschutes, enjoying the sunshine with Kira and Lindsay--friends from church. I was in the canoe with Anna and Michael, and Daniel and the three girls were distributed between the two rafts. Anna asked for some chicken and I immediately reached into the bag and broke off a beautiful piece for her. I was happy to do it. At the same time that I broke off a piece for her, I also broke off a piece for Michael and gave them both to him, as he was in the middle between me and Anna. He handed a piece her direction, but she, not seeing the offer, looked at me and asked impatiently for some chicken. At that point I said "Anna, as soon as you asked, I gave you the chicken, but I am giving it to you through Michael." Look to me for provision but receive it through Michael.
All the toys in the house are mine. No, that's not the attitude of my two year old, though you're not far off in thinking so--many two year olds do have that belief. My kids are firm in this understanding: everything in the house is Dad's (Mine). In there is my bunkbed. You are wearing my boots. This flashlight is mine. This doll is mine. Do you want to play with my doll? I will share it gladly! I don't fit these boots. Do you want to wear them for a year until they're too small for you? Do you guys want to sleep in my bunkbed? I'll share. But please keep in mind that you don't have rights to the stuff I put in your hands. I am a big giver, but it would hurt my heart if you were greedy with my stuff.